many paths…they just confuse me


Back to the mind-blowing roundabouts of always focusing on the future, the next step in life, the next adventure, relocation, searching for a better, richer, and more fulfilling experiences…I have been so devoted to the future, that I am no longer present here and now.
Yesterday, at meditation class, for the first time in months, I realized that I have gone away again. As we have been literally transferred into the future, a time when we are finally together with Sami, I have forgotten about now. It takes a shower of ambivalence to actually devote yourself to the moment and realize how precious and real it is, and it is all we got. Preoccupations with the future, constant ruminations with planning, they all take you further away from any actual living.

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